Tag: wonder

Posted in Living this Life

Air shows and roller coasters and prayers

Posted on by Sara

For that brief moment, as the ground shook and the sky roared, I could not stop myself from gasping out loud. I looked around me at my sons, and saw the same look on their faces – awe … wonder.

I’ve been thinking about that day alot lately. Also about my journey from where I was to where I am. And about the invisible line in our lives that keeps us in our “safe” little boxes. This strange day brought so many of those pieces together in one gasp.

We went to the air show. It was exciting – there were pilots doing things with planes that no plane is designed to do. We took so many pictures, saw so many stunts, ate good food, enjoyed the music, and generally had a really fun time.

But then the Blue Angels took to the sky, and everything was different. These F/A-18E/F Super Hornets can brag about their power, their speed, their G forces – but all I know is they took my breath away as they roared over my head in a way I had seldom experienced.

Then it was over in a split second, it seemed. But my heart was still racing. And I wondered – when is the last time my heart has raced like that? How often do I experience that “whatness” that is impossible to put into words, but we all know it when we feel it.

As those planes roared overhead, and my mouth hung open, I thought of the words of Jonathan Edwards – that we ought to “be endeavoring by all possible ways to inflame [our] desires and to obtain more spiritual pleasures. . . . Endeavor to promote spiritual appetites by laying yourself in the way of allurement” (Sermon on Canticles)

Allurement – what a weird word. Who says that anymore? I googled it and was told “allurement means fascination, charm, or the power to entice or attract”

I mean – isn’t that pretty much what I felt when those jets roared above me … power to entice or attract? We use other words, but I just couldn’t stop thinking that if I had just stayed home that day and not made an active choice to be where the planes were, I would have missed the moment.

But then more happened… keep walking through that crazy wonderful day with me. Because this next part is what makes me shake my head a bit and lean in to what this all really means.

We left the airshow and meandered over to our favorite amusement park, where they had a concert going on. This concert was a southern gospel staple – not the kind of music I listen to most of the time, but a fun way to end the day. As the concert kicked off, the emcee had a moment of prayer. And as the crowd in the ampitheater grew quiet for prayer, the emcee began to pray, and suddenly we heard screams erupt. Startled, I lifted my head to see what seemed like a strange juxtaposition, and that is when the Holy Spirit spoke loudly to my heart.

Behind the ampitheatre stage where a man stood with his head bowed is the tallest, fastest, steepest spinning roller coaster in the world. And as he said “dear Lord…”, that roller coaster hurtled behind him full of riders screaming in exhileration.

I giggled a little. Then I felt a little bad about giggling in the middle of a prayer. Then I pictured a smile on Jesus’ face – in the middle of it all and realized – there’s something more happening in the middle of all this. What do ground shaking jets, a simple prayer, and screams from a coaster all have in common? That simple phrase, “lay yourself in the way of allurement” kept rolling around in my head.

In this world of self promotion, branding, and influencers, the next great thing is always tugging at us. And that moment – my ears still ringing with the roar of jet engines, and now juxtaposed with the screams of exhileration alongside of a moment of prayer – made me pause: what does it mean to lay yourself in the way of allurement? Is it about seeking out the next adrenaline pumping exhileration and bouncing from one experiential high to the next? Is it the moments of solitude and quiet that comes in prayer? Were the screams of the roller coaster riders interrupting our prayer – or augmenting it?

I’m not here to break it all down for you and give you a simple formulaic answer. But I walk away with a truth in my heart: this wonder in life is all around us – each of us – every day. Whether it is in the ground shaking power of a plane, a quiet moment of prayer, or the unexpected drop of a roller coaster – there is a moment to capture that slips away in just that moment. How are we doing at letting it in? Are we living purposefully in the moments that we are given?

To wake up in the morning and be aware of the firmness of the mattress, the warmth of the sun’s rays, the sound of the clock ticking, the sheer being of things… becom[ing] alive to life… seeing what is there in the world—things that, if we didn’t have, we would pay a million dollars to have, but having them, ignore. Become more alive to beauty. Put your soul on notice that there are daily wonders that will waken worship if we open our eyes. (amended from quote by John Piper)

David captures this thought so perfectly in Psalm 35:7-10: “Both  high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house; You give them drink from Your river of delights. For with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light”

I guess what I’m trying to say is this: God has filled my life – your life – with innumerable “allurements”. Wonders and beauty and unexpected winks that are meant to “fascinate, charm, entice, and attract”.

Are we seeing it? What clouds our vision? Sometimes the fog of pain can be too thick – life can be so upside down it’s impossible to see through it. That’s real – yet even there, maybe this can help usher in a ray of light. I suspect on most days, however – for most of us – we’re just a bit too distracted. Glowing screens in our faces, the crush of the to-do list, the flurry of life, the decisions and challenges and daily pressures all crowd in and our eyes stop truly seeing.

Entering into this Christmas season with our surroundings decorated and our air filled with different music, maybe this is an invitation to live on purpose. To choose every day to lay yourself in the way of His allurements – to find the treasures He has tucked into your everyday rush that feed your soul with wonder and joy and life. To see and to savor, whether it’s the roar of jet engines, screams from a roller coaster, or just a quiet prayer.

“I will give you the treasures of darkness and hidden riches of secret places, that you may know that I, the Lord, who call you by your name, am the God of Israel” Isaiah 45:3

Posted in Living this Life

The extraordinary Ordinary

Posted on by Sara

Where were you when it happened?

That moment that changed your life… what were you doing in that moment? That moment when God came down? When your life was struck by something extraordinary and you were never the same…

Were you in Walmart? At work? Stuck in traffic? Making dinner or doing laundry? Or still waiting for a moment like that to hit, perhaps?

We’re in the season right now where there is alot of talk of Mary. You know, the Mary, who God chose to give birth to His deity… and I wonder: Where was she when it happened? What was she doing? When Gabriel visited and whispered words that changed her life forever. Words that we celebrate 2,000 years later because they also changed our lives forever.

So, I ponder my question. What was she doing to precipitate the visit of an

archangel? No one really knows. There are an awful lot of prettied up

images that seem alot holier than the lives we live. In these pictures Mary

often has a gold orb floating around her head and zero personality on her face… it’s hard to relate.

Maybe it will help if we back up a bit … we know what others were doing when a moment like this hit.

We know Abraham was just sitting … escaping the blazing heat of the sun by sitting in the entrance to his tent (Gen 18:1)

“For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chronicles 16:9)

We know that Moses was tending sheep for his father-in-law in the desert. Just another day at the office for him. (Exodus 3)

“For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chronicles 16:9)

We know that Gideon was threshing wheat in a winepress – hiding and afraid, but still going about his work (Judges 6)

“For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chronicles 16:9)

We know that Zechariah was just doing his duties in ministry … nothing out of the ordinary prepared him for the extraordinary that was about to rock his world (Luke 1)

“For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chronicles 16:9)

We also know that mighty angels visited when Jacob was running away from home, Hagar was about to die of thirst, Lot’s life was in danger, Peter was in prison and Philip was told to go take a walk on a foreign road.

Finally – those famous shepherds on the hills outside Bethlehem… the ones we love to sing about? They were just dirty shepherds of ill repute, putting in another shift, keeping track of their sheep on a night like every other.

So here I am, returning once again to my original question in these days before Christmas: what was Mary doing when the eyes of the Lord found her? We hear that her Joseph was sleeping when the angel appeared to him … Scripture just doesn’t tell us about Mary. But you can see the pattern with me, can’t you? It seems she was most likely doing what she did every day. Living her ordinary life. Only, God didn’t find it so ordinary, and on that particular day, He chose to come down.

We live in a culture consumed by the extraordinary – We laud it on facebook and glamorize it on Instagram. We create dances for it on tik-tok and embed it with gravitas on X. We crave that viral moment that will somehow make our existence extraordinary. And we feel diminished by the “ordinary” of our lives when we see the tantalizing lives of others flashing before our eyes. And we wonder how we can be seen. How we can matter. How our ordinary lives can compete with all this extraordinary.

And young Mary was just going about her day – perhaps doing laundry or making bread. I don’t think there was anything different about that day when she woke up, but that day forever changed everything. The eyes of the LORD saw her. He saw her heart, fully committed to Him. And there, in all that ordinary, He came.

Do not scorn the ordinary, my friend. Do not look down on the insignificant and seemingly unseen. It is in this crucible that the realness of who we are settles in. It is the prayers uttered while up to your elbows scrubbing dishes in the sink or rocking your baby to sleep at 2 in the morning though your eyes refuse to stay open. It is while you are fixing your car or paying your bills. These are the tender places we find Jesus and determine if our hearts will stay fully committed to Him.

And these are the moments when He finds us. When a life can be altered in an instant – and we spend all our ordinary days preparing for it. So do not scorn the ordinary days, my friend. Rather, choose you this day whom you will serve … and serve Him with all your heart. Keep your ear pressed tight against His chest and listen to the thrum of His heartbeat. In all the ordinary, watch for Him and be ready. He’s weaving His story all around you right now, this moment! As His eyes range throughout the earth, what will He see when they land on you?

You may not expect an archangel to visit you in your kitchen or in your car on the way to work – neither did Mary. The truth is, God could send an archangel at any moment into our lives… but He doesn’t need to. Some of His final words to His disciple were this: “But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.” (John 14:26) And this is the reality that blows my mind and leaves me on my knees in worship!

Moses visited with God in a burning bush – and that same God resides in our hearts today! Abraham shared a meal under a tree with his 3 visitors, and Jesus Himself says to us, “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.” (Rev. 3:20) When we are scared like Gideon, doing our mundane work in hiding, we are told, “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” (2 Timothy 1:7) When, like Zechariah, our days are filled with serving others, we get this promise: “you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” (Acts 1:8)

Try to wrap your mind around that. The God who created the Universe, wrapping Himself in the temple of our soul. And we think having angel drop by would be something extraordinary.

Just stop! For one minute, just stop the hurry, the bustle, the distractions. Set down your phone, close your eyes, and let this wonder wash over you. Stop chasing the extraordinary and let the woder of this truth sink deep into your soul.

Now open your eyes and look around you. What are you doing … this moment? Do you believe that the Spirit of God is with you – with a power greater than the archangel that visited Mary? Oh follower of Jesus, this is one of the final promises made by Jesus before He returned to heaven! Do you live like you believe it? And if you don’t know Him yet, oh friend – choose Him today! In this season where we celebrate welcoming Him to earth – will you welcome Him into your heart?

It seems the only real response right now is through the words of young Samuel: “speak, Lord, for your servant is listening” (1 Samuel 3:10)

“For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chronicles 16:9)

Posted in Living this Life

I had a dream

Posted on by Sara

I carried a dream – back in those days.

And then the dream died.

“unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies”, Jesus said, “it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.”

That didn’t feel very helpful, back in those days. How am I supposed to know what to do with that cold, hard, dead dream that sits in ones soul and refuses to let go?

On the day the dream died, back in 2009, I wrote these words in my journal: “Waves of discouragement, sadness, hopelessness. I feel like I’ve run out of faith – my well is empty. “

How can such hard pain produce many seeds? How can seed be multiplied in death?

It didn’t seem possible, so I tried to ignore it.

I pretended I didn’t care anymore.

I wouldn’t let myself think about it.

I certainly couldn’t let myself dream that dream anymore … it just hurt too much.

Do you have a dream? Are you braver than me? Brave enough to hold that dream close and hold your breath in anticipation? Brave enough to wait for the promise? Brave enough to trust when all hope is lost?

Back in those days, when the dream was still alive, we drew up plans you could touch – rough drawings for a building.

A building that would be a place of safety and peace for searching young people. A place to train and teach. They were simple plans – but they were the seed. Then, miracle of miracles, in the face of impossible odds, we had land – an acre to build that dream. For the seed to grow. So more plans were drawn – in more detail and greater color as hope suddenly had form!

Then, on that fateful day in 2009, it all faded to nothing, like a mirage. Bureocracy and red tape and roadblocks, and the plans were slowly tucked away, pushed to the back of a box somewhere. That seed of hope slowly died and was also tucked away. But not forgotten. Never forgotten. How could they be forgotten when the dream still lingered like a rock in the center of my stomach?

I’m guessing you know how that feels. We’ve been feeling these things since the beginning of time. 1,000 years before Jesus was born, King Solomon wrote “hope deferred makes the heart sick” Proverbs 13:12. Your dream might look different – but we all know the giddiness of hope and the agony of loss.

Then in 2016, the Spirit began to blow on that cold, buried seed. Glimmers of hope began to appear, but I was so scared. Those are the days I wrote these words: “Today we spent 5 hours talking about the dream. We did more than dream vapor – it is a real and deep sense that God is on the move in this – and the time is NOW… Lord, I stand here in fear and trembling. I have stood on this threshold before. And I have had my dreams dashed.”

My heart quakes when I read those words. I feel that tension still – that longing to hope and yet fearing hope itself. It didn’t happen right away – those were the first signs of spring when you know winter isn’t over yet. But slowly, that seed began to thaw and show signs of life. And then the floodgates opened… There were more plans drawn – pages and pages of detail. It was a time of wonder and endurance – when God’s promise to open the storehouses of heaven become reality, the flood can be overwhelming. Like desperate Peter, scrambling in a sinking boat because the catch of fish was too much to take in, we felt like we were sinking, some days. And other days it felt like we were dancing on the waves. It was all the stuff of miracles. The smile of God.

And these days, I walk the halls of the physical reality of that dream – realized in grander detail than I ever dared hope for. Every part of this building is built on the promises of God – literally. Scrawled on the inside beams of the walls and the concrete of the flooring are promises that poured out of the hearts of the many who were part of the multiplication of the seed.

My original dream – the one I lost – was just a single seed. Jesus said, “if it dies, it produces many seeds.” God combined the seed of my dream with the seeds of so many others, added His supernatural multiplication – and today we do life together in these walls. We laugh together and pray together. We create and learn together. We worship Jesus – together. People use words like peace and safety when they walk in these doors – because this was built on the promise of God and not the hands of man. “In that day they will say, ‘Surely this is our God; we trusted in Him, and He saved us.” Ps 62:8

I used to think this was my dream – but that seed needed to die. Because God had so much more to grow – so many more seeds to resurrect. They have names these days – brothers and sisters who work alongside me to make this vision a reality. Students who walk these halls with me, eager to change the world. And I believe they will.

This is the miracle – the multiplication of hope resurrected!

But this story isn’t just about me or my dream – the seed God buried deep in my heart. This story is about the Sower – the planter of Hope and the Reaper of miracles. The Multiplier of dreams and the Resurrecting Power that turns all death into life. Slow your racing mind for a moment. Quiet the distractions that fill your world with noise. Listen for it. Do you hear Him?

What is your dream? What longing do you carry buried in your heart, planted deep and desperate for hope? What hope have you given up on and tucked away in the deep recesses of your heart because the dream was too impossible? Do you feel His Spirit breathing? After all, that’s what resurrection does – it moves the power from us to the Source of all Power – to “Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us” (Ephesians 3:20)

Hold that dream that lives in your heart – and breathe deep of His presence in that place. Water that seed with the Word of God. Release it to Him to grow it. It will look different than anything you imagined – that’s the beauty of it all. “One thing God has spoken, two things I have heard: “Power belongs to you, God, and with you, Lord, is unfailing love” Ps 62:11-12. Ultimate Power fused with Unfailing Love – complete safety. In this sacred space, you can breathe deep… and rest.

For this isn’t the end of the dreams or the quietly waiting seeds. Some have been buried deep in my heart for longer than this one. And I am at peace with it. The restlessness has faded into eager anticipation.

I feel the winds stirring – “Aslan is on the move”, my soul whispers.

and so I watch the horizon and wait.